3 REST DAYS

haaay, It's been the 3rd day. 3 straight days haven't see him online (what I mean, OL with cams) though he will log in like at 9pm there or around 5pm here in the Cebu. But sadly, I'm in my work and can't just adjust nor find a way to go online where I can see him. Luckily got my uzzap still working, at least we have time to talk but not see each other. I so miss him, as in so much...

I tried waking up as early as I can than the usual days I woke up, wishing he'll go online and thinking he want to see me also. But I think it's just my imagination acting up a bit.Maybe he's just too busy on something or there's just too much work to do or maybe enjoying the 3 days RD. I just don't know what he is up to right now but I need not to freak out as I promised him, I need to think that no matter what happen everything is just fine, just like normal days. But this is not normal, I feel so awful. Normal days is going online talkin' and seeing him.

I need to lessen some things (love, care, attention) , lengthen my patience & understand. Give him a break for this is what he need, as he kept on saying. Thus, I'm trying to give it to him though I suck at this for my heart want him always, need him like I've never needed anyone in my life before.

I can't deny that my days are incomplete without seeing him. My days are so damn awful when I can't hear anything from  him. My days are so sad & lonely without the thoughts of him and those are killing me deep inside. Those 3 days that he's out of my sight is like a huge hole has been punched through my chest. I've been trying to look for him everywhere, even locking my eyes to his FB profile, browsing his pictures, reading his messages again and again but it can't seem to heal my longing heart. It so different when I'm able to see him through skype cam & chat with him in yahoo messenger or used gmail for me to see him clearly. It's different when I got to see his smiles just only for me. It's so different to hear him when he'll said "i love you kulit". It's so different when I got to see how he yawn when his sleepy for we've been talking for hours. It's so different when he'll make fun of his self or crack silly jokes so that I can laugh my heart out. It's so different when I know you're just there on the other side looking at me. Whew! I really wanna cry...dom dom dom dom... & all I'm thinking is it's my choice to get affected so I shouldn't get affected. I shouldn't!!! (but my heart is already whipping sadly)

I need to focus on making myself happy now even if it means without seeing him for the next couple of days. argh! or I need not to freak out and have patience that high so that I'll not going to get mad and start a fight.

I just remembered one line from Ms. Sheryl : "If mo.online, maayo. If dli mo.online, kevs wui!!!"

so kevs jd!!!

X'mas Gift

Belated X'mas Gift

This cause me 2 sleepless nights (sleep 3am in the morning) and my wrist from throbbing. My Rest Day last Dec. 26-27 are one of the busiest day after those busy days I have before from making something special.

This is my belated X'mas gift for someone special, can't give the full details yet for it's still a SURPRISE but he already knew. How can this be a surprise? Well, secret...  It's for him to find out. Can't wait 'till I have the hard copy or the output of my hardwork.

Because he is so SPECIAL, the efforts, the sleepless nights, the back ache, headache and the wrist throbbing is all worth it.

Well be posting sooner for the full details and the content.

Keep posted for updates!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

CHRISTMAS won't be the same without YOU!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS myBanako!!!

I still have the perfect Christmas gift ever and tha'ts having YOU in my life. Even though our Xmas eve turned out not that good but I know for sure that deep in our hearts we both want to have a Merry Christmas. Thus, it's never too late... & never too late for all the things we talked about last night...

Merry Christmas myBanako!!! iloveyousomuch, no occassion that I wish you're with me. For it will be more merrier, more happier to spend Christmas and to spend all days with you. There's nothing I could ask for more than just be with somone whom I wanna spend my life with and it's YOU...

by the way, a little reminder:
"when things get wrong never ever suggest of letting go for it's a little reminder that this time, you should hold on more", right? iLoveyousomuchmyBanako...

wishing you a happy blessed Christmas & hopefully, sooner I'll be with you... mwaaahhhh

Hope to be with you soon..mwah..


iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako..mwah...



L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

Happy 6th anniversary

Happy 6th anniversary myBanako!

Whew!... its been 6 years myBanako.. dugaya na nato wui! nanigowang nata aning atong relasyon B...hehehe...

Haay! I was looking for a pic myBanako earlier so that I'll give it to you as a gift. Those pictures were already posted in our FB account and in tumbleblog and also here.

I miss you myBanako, I was reminiscing our memories together when I was looking for a pix. haaay, wish you're here with me and wish I'm there. For 6 years, still love jpon ayoooooooooooo tka. You're everything that I wanted. God made my dream come true when I found you and love you. Can't imagine still that its already 6 years B. 6 years...

Do you still remember what happened 6 years ago? hmm...nakalimot nako!..bwahahaha..

myBanako, i love you... i love you so much.. if you'll count how many times I already said those 3 words for sure, you can no longer count it. It doesn't matter anyway, love jd tka...hehehe..

inLove man jpon ko nmo B wui, hehhehe... You still make me so happy despite with the situation right now. Don't worry myBanako, mg.happy2x nata hap! & I'll try my very best nga dli njd mangaway and dapat mo.sabot ko sa situation.

myBanako, iL0veyousomuch... nothing more to say and more to feel than "You're always here with me. I keep you in a safe place here in my heart...."

i miss youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu so much..mwaaah.


Happy 6th anniversary myBanako! mwwah..

iL0veyousomuchmyBanako & i always will...

Hope to be with you soon..mwah..


iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako..mwah...



L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

Happy 6th anniversary

Happy 6th anniversary myBanako!

Nothing that I could ask for more than be with you for the rest of my life....for all of my heart and for all of ME...

i miss you so much...

iL0veyousomuchmyBanako...mwah...

ONE WISH

It's my special day and I only slept for about 4 hours for I arrived late from our Xmas party last night in which I though I will not enjoyed. *luckily i was able to enjoy it despite thinking some other things...

I actually received a text last night from him and made me wanna hear his voice but he did not answer phone for I guess his already sleeping og gahagok njd ang show. But despite it, he made my night and put my best smile.

I was planning not to celebrate my birthday for I was thinking its no good still for I don't have him with me. But after reading his heart-warming teary-breaking message I then, decided to celebrate and be happy on this day. And I felt happy for I know His with me though not physically but his with ME hear in my little heart.

I ONLY HAVE ONE WISH & BEEN WISHING IT 'TILL I FOUND HIM: BE WITH ME AS LONG AS I LIVE myBanako...

THAANKKK YOUOO SO MUCH myBanako... You never fail to make me so haaapppyy.. I'm sorry I let you worry at times and I was setting boundaries. storya rato B wui! para maningoha kah, kai relax2x rapa pd kah!... hehehehe.. But the truth is, I WANNA SPEND MY ENTIRE LIFE WITH YOU, og ikaw rjd!!!... mwaaaah...

iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako..mwaah..

hoping my next birthday you're already in my side...

Happy Birthday My Kulit

Hi Kulit!

wui2x happy bday na niya.. hehe. let me sing you a song " maligayang bati sa 'yung kaarawan happy3x bday!". btaw kulit try to be happy eventhough things are going not we wanted. 8 seemed very hard though but just try to see the bright side of things around you and hopefully you'll see the answers. Strip off your fears and you'll find peace. Bet all your trust and I won't lose it promise. hehe. di lgi sureness! bhala ka f dli ka believe. Kulit I'm not really happy of what's been happening to us since we r thousands of miles apart. I just couldn't bear d thought seeing you not very well these past few months. I need you to be strong coz n U i gain strength. I need you to understand though you always say it back to my face that I am the one who failed. Sorry tawn day! boss madam wa tuyua usahay di ko ka.inform nmo circumstances lng maam which I couldn't control. Btaw kulit I need U not 2 freak out ky ng.behave tawn ko as far as I could remmber.hehe. Btaw honest!. binuang ra kulit hap. Anyway, this should be all about your bday and not making excuses for myself in which I strongly plead my innocence. Dghan njd ka role ko life my aswa judge npd kah. hehe. I have some birthday wishes for you kulit:


1. Health- I wish all the best possible healthy mind nd body u could attain. So ayaw jd tawn pataka kaon day sa gawas bantay ka lng. You'd better bring your own lunch than kaon bisan asa. Take care of yourself! that's the most I could ask you to do for me. Don't let anybody to hurt u unless u permit them to do so. Ahak guilty ko ani! Sorry kulit i ddnt mean those. I'm willing to change for the better pero gradual lng sah. hehe

2. Career- May you find happiness at work. Ahak guilty npd ko ani coz u put a lot more of emotions rather than focusing on what you are doing then what will happen? ruins everything!. lecture nani kulit not a wish. hehe. Btaw be happy sa work I don't want to elaborate ky mag.tigi npd ta ani. I really want you to pursue your IT field but it's up to you I'm in whichever you like to!

3. Relationship- I wish an everlasting relationship with you. I've never been so spoiled like this before. Sorry for at times you felt like I was abusing it. Thank you for loving me this much kulit although most of the time I always tell you to lessen coz it's way too too too much. Very thankful for that kulit.. One more thing, I wish you could tighten your grip more just enough to see your hand marks whenever we have to let go. We'll try our best kulit!- not giving conditions and setting boundaries to give up.


I've been always wishing that you are here with me every minute of my day. I miss all about you. Miss your hugs and kisses my aswa. I've been sick without them. I love you so much. Happy Birthday!. Mwah. I love you kulit.

bound to wait

thinking with the days that passed....................

and oh!...days passed by so quickly.. you can't just notice it, i guess. for my life right now is bound to wait. and the more, i think of waiting, the more wreck and the more insane i become. i just couldn't let a day pass without getting crazy for waiting specially with some not-so-good factors that includes in waiting. i don't wanna wait in vain and I do hate waiting since ever since I know how vast life is. if i want something, i want to have it like RIGHT NOW. I'm always like that. And life is not about getting all you want right away, you need to wait for the right time for there is a right time for anything, everything or every dreams that will come true. And I'm just one hell damn s* stupid girl, for not believing in that. And right now, is my test. argh!. My test is so damn difficult. i hate it.. i hate it much.. i so damn hate it... but what can I do?

my thought will still be back to a no choice answer and that's : WAIT...

For true love can wait, even if it takes forever... forever? oh!.so damn, take my life now... that can't be... but I know & I must believe that everything will fall into place, everything will be fine, HIM and ME will be back in each others arms again. All I just need to keep in mind and do is HOLD ON, FIGHT THE LONELINESS & WAIT...

December 4

Its already....hmmmm, let me check the calendar what day is it already. *checkingmylaptopcalendar

Oh!. its alreday December 4, just how many days for Christmas or my Special Day. Honestly, don't want to think about it. Don't want to think of anything. I just want to think of NOTHING. Nothing that could somehow hide this holiday blues that I'm feeling. I know I can't just avoid parties for it's December and there will be like 2 parties that I should attend. First, Company part. Second, Team Party. But I wanna think that I attend not because of celebrating the holidays but just attending for it is required/needed. I'm needed to be there, like a prerequisite subject. Haaay, how I wish and wish and wish that I can just sleep all throughout the year and wake up 'till he come back. Will that be possible?

I need you, I need you...this is killing me especially this coming holiday. But I have and need to continue living for you. I have to...

i need you, i need you...more & more each day

i miss you...

nothing much to say....
nothing much to think....

i so damn, freaking, insane miss you!

I MISS YOU B!

happy 71sth monthsarry myBanako...

To someone who is so special...

you made my life so doomed.
you always made me cry.
you made me guilty at times even though it's not my fault.
you always made me worry about you when you will not inform me what you're doing or how are you..
you made me jealous about you.
you made everything so miserable.
you made me so depressed....

what the heck I'm saying...

that will gonna happen to me if you'll be out of my life...
Everything about you is so wonderful, that I miss you not because of I did not treasure each moments with you but rather I miss you because I never been happier in my life when you're just around.

Each day spent with you is the happiest day of my life that, I keep on wishing hope it'll not end. I end up always anticipating the day on when will talk again and be with each others' arms again. Despite the distance, the hell, you still can break my heart but still the only person who can fix it. I might be sad sometimes or depress for not having you around but you manage to lighten my day and made me happy though it means I only got to see you through cam. It really doesn't matter where we are, the distance, for I know we both have the same hearts, SAME HEARTS, SAME FEELINGS, SAME LEVEL of LOVE that I know will conquer each odds.

You're positive way of thinking made me appreciate you more and made me think positively too, though I know at times, I think bad. My source of strength is YOU, that each day thinking about you is better place to live and a happy day to look forward.

I just can't deny how in love I am with you as I truly, definitely and pretty do. I know it's obvious this love I have for you but I want to tell you so many times and never get tired saying and letting this to you that "you are love so much by me, kulit".

I can't wait the day, when I'll be with you. Can touch you, hug you, share smile with you and just be near with you. I can't wait the day when I'll wake up with a smile on my face for I know you're next to me smiling also. I can't wait to date you forever and ever that nobody will scold us for we don't come home.

I simply can't wait to be with you & fulfill our plans, our dreams and our future together...

iL0veyousomuchmyBanako & i always will...

Hope to be with you soon..mwah..


iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako..mwah...




L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

the one who love more

For the past few days of not feeling well and having myself back. I'm doom again to this unbearable feeling of missing someone so much. I just can't help it, like can't help myself from thinking of him. From the moment that the sun rise and wake up from heavy sleep I can then think of him. His face will just then pop up from that same old place that occupy my mind and my heart for the very long time while staring at the ceiling to absorb myself that I'm already awake. Then, my day starts thinking I can survive this long day and wishing his there with me. Go on with my daily routine on what I have for the day. Sometimes, we will go online and we chat and talk for a while and this will somehow cover up the loneliness and somehow will help me go through the day.

And at the middle of the day or at the end of the day, still my mind is lingering to every thought of him. Whether I'm on the jeepney going to work, or while eating my lunch in the pantry or just about to sleep. I always have my phone with me, checking on him from time to time or shall I say include him to whatever activities I have. When I'm about to sleep, I usually put my cellphone on an upright position just to see his YM ID flash on the monitor and bid my goodnights and found myself talking to my phone. Yeah, it might sound crazy but this is what I do each and everyday/every night. Even I know he'll not go online but this keep me sane, this keep me think his always part of me no matter where or when.

Whatever my mood is for the day, I can't cease to keep my mind from thinking of him and my heart from wanting him each day with me. I can sometimes pondered that there are two individuals in a relationship. The one who love more and the one who receive the love more. And I can't deny I'm the first person. Well, his deserving for this love I have. I was once, the one who received the love more and the one who easily give up then let go and move on like nothing happens. Its just one day everything turns upside down. And how everything, change me into someone that is stronger and capable of understanding more, loving more and capable of holding on more.

I was really afraid to love more, to give everything I have and let someone know th real me. But the moment that it hits me, there I go. Giving up and providing everything for this special someone I choose to live my life for eternity or shall I say as long as I live. He hold the key to my heart. No one could ever unlock it. There might be some other things that are inevitable and we can never tell. However, I believe that we are bound for each other. Destined to be one. Fate allow our path to cross.

Though I love more and know that I'm vulnerable to pain more. I'm really such a weakling especially on the matter of my emotions and feelings are concerned. Plus him... No matter how illogical and irrational I might be sometimes in showing him how much i love him, that is just ME. Falling so deeply in love with him.

i miss you so much myBanako..mwah..

I was afraid to love more but what can I do. It hits me, and the only choice I have is to love you and love you more each day. Choice that I so love to do everyday.

iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako..mwah...




L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

back to normal...

I'm about to sleep but might as well share the happy feeling I feel right now. The feeling that I so wanted to feel each day, for it can make me go through the day and can survive no matter how day started and how day ends. I'm not feeling well this past few days as what you can read on my previous post. Right now, whew! I have my smile back .__. the smile that don't have any heavy head nor heart. No pretensions at all. Like, whew... I'm fine. I'm back to normal again. It's like I breath fresh air again, that my lungs were cleansed with the new fresh air that I take in. It's like yeah!. wohooo!!.. rock on.. kulit rulsz! \m/ feeling. It's like I feel so beautiful despite the big eye bags I have under my eyes. It's like, just an ordinary day turn out a special day. It's really good to have myself back. I miss having this feeling, when I'm not in the mood it seems I have those bad feelings for centuries that I don't have the idea how the bloody hell, the were able to capture me.

I guess, I'm just imperfectly human. Have feelings. Feelings that sometimes you can't deny that you can never neglect. Any how, it really felt good I have myself back. Still whole, though there are already scars but the most important thing is I still have myself and myBanako of course, and God also. I like much what I feel right now, that I can sleep with tears not cause with sorrows or pains that I felt on the past few days but with happiness and joy you felt. I hope I can continue to feel this way.

Thank you myBanako, for being there. For helping me. I'm really having a hard time making myself back to normal. It's not the same when I know and feel I have you. Thank you so much, for everything and for understanding. Please keep on holding me myBanako though I acted stupid and crazy at times.

iLoveyousomuchmyBanako.. mwah.. i miss you terribly...
Good night and I'll met you in dreamland.

You still bring the best out of me even my smile... d: )



L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

sweet misery

I am not really feeling well this days. It's like I'm tearing apart. I'm broken. Everything around me irritates me. It made me hate everything. It made me questions on things and couldn't find any answers. I wanna scream and shout and let everybody know how it is so hard to be like this. Like you wanted something but don't know how to get it or don't have any choice on achieving it. It's like your dying to be with someone but don't know how for time and distance are separating you apart. I don't have any choice at all in getting what I want. I just couldn't take it anymore the things that I'm thinking. I wanted him to understand things but he have his own business to think about. I don't wanna add up or put more pressures to him, but that's what I'm doing. I couldn't just pretend and let him feel that I'm Okay for surely, he knows me better than anyone else. I just can't smile and lift him up when I'm tearing apart inside. I can't just give him comfort when in the first place I need him to comfort me, comfort me like a baby. I can't just understand him when I'am too broken to understand myself first. And nor that I can't just neglect this all when it's killing me inside. Occupying every corner of my brain, eating it all up. All I wanna do these days is cry, cry, cry and cry 'till I can cry no more. Until my eyes have no more tears to fall. I know this is not healthy of me, but what can I do. Pretend to smile? Pretend to enjoy? Pretend to have fun? that's foolishness. For I tried it, I really tried my very best. The best of the best that I can give just as to pretend to be happy, to try to forget everything. But the feeling makes it worst inside of me. Here I am in the corner of my room, with tears falling while writing this. I wanna be okay. I wanna be back to my normal self, for I know right now I'm in my second worst self. The second worst feeling I can feel.

I know, his up to something these days but I just do hope he can help me back to my normal self. I know his affected with these all damn feelings I have and I'm so sorry for that myBanako from the bottom of my broken heart. I feel guilty about with me also and one day, I can make it up to you. I'm so soory for being like this. You are just the only person that I know can feel and understand on what's happening to me. You are the only person that I know I can run to without pretensions. The only person whom I know can help me back to my own self.

its just that...

I need you...

Sorry for needing you this much, I'll try to help myself with the very best of best I can. I'm still not getting used without you, no matter how hard I tried practicing it. I can make it perfect. Maybe one day, one day. *sigh* d:(

I love you still though... as n much.. mwaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh :*

The night that was....

The night that was...

So, what really happenned last night, why did I cry myself to sleep? Nothing much really but the fact that I think I can't take it anymore.

I wake up with a headache for I was not able to sleep well last night. I was crying my heart out. My sister, was still awake when I arrived home and she then, have a lil chit-chat with me on my room while playing with ace. We then talked for a while about boys, about him and about this feeling I have. But I didn't cry infront of her, for I don't want her to have any idea that I'm really having difficulty with the situation I have now with him. I was pretending to be cool.

After which, I pretended to be asleep for she is still playing with Ace but then, the real truth. I was crying myself to sleep. Even in the office, during my 1 hour break, there are bunch of gays practicing and laughigh but I don't even have the courage to lift my lips to smile. For what I wanna do is cry but trying to stop it coz' I don't want anybody will notice it... the heck, I'm writing my emotion right now... d:(

I was crying 'til I was able to sleep, the result I woke up with a headache.

Nothing had happenned why I cried. It's just that I felt needing him last night most, but he was not able to go online. (already know the reason, but I understand and pretended to not understood it)

I just don't know how I'll control all this mixed emotions and all the question I have. Then, pretend is fine. Pretend everything are alright. I wished I'm like anybody that can just pretend & hide the pains through the smiles especially with him. For I know I'm putting pressures on him and hopefuly *crossingmyfingers* he will understand what I went through. It's just that its so really hard, to wake up each day where you just imagined him also next to you. It's really hard to comfort all yourself without him by my side, comforting me when I needed him too. It's so hard to just close my eyes and imagine him hugging me like it has never happenned.

I know this is just a test of time. I know, but its hard... huuhuhuh... d:(

But still, I don't have a choice. We are separated with time and distance. He is millions apart from me right now.

No choice, even how tired and how much I feel giving up. At the end of the day I'll still find myself falling inlove with him more & more each day...

I just wanna be with YOU....

I just wanna be with him.

I just wanna be with YOU...

This is the song I kept on playing after I woke up with a heavy head

for I'm having a headache this morning.

Headache due to I cry myself to sleep last night. The story of my the night that was on the next post.

I just wanna be with you myBanako. I'm missing you so terribly.

Vanessa Hudgens - Just Wanna Be With You ft. Lucas Gabreel, Zac Efron

(Ryan) Mmm...I got a lot of things
I have to do
All these distractions
Our future is coming soon
We're being pulled
(Ryan and Chelsea) A hundred different directions
(Ryan) But whatever happens
(Ryan and Chelsea) I know I've got you

(Ryan) You're on my mind
You're in my heart
(Ryan and Chelsea) It doesn't matter where we are
(Ryan) We'll be alright
Even if we're
(Ryan and Chelsea) Miles apart

(Chorus, Troy and Gabriella) All I wanna do
Is be with you, be with you
There's nothing we can't do
I just wanna be with you, only you
No matter where life takes us
Nothing can break us apart
(Troy) (You know it's true)
I just wanna be with you

(Troy) You know how life can be
It changes over night
(Troy and Gabrialla)It's not even raining
But it's alright

(Gabriella) A friend like you
(Troy and Gabriella) Always makes it easy
(Troy) I know that you give me
(Both) Every time

(Both) Through every up
Through every down
You know I'll always be around
Through anything you can count on me

(Chorus, Troy and Gabriella) All I wanna do
Is be with you, be with you
There's nothing we can't do
I just wanna be with you, only you
No matter where life takes us
Nothing can break us apart
(Troy) (You know it's true)
I just wanna be with you

(Both) I just wanna be with you

i miss you

I miss you...

I miss the old days. The old days, when I'm excited if it's the last day of duty because I know we have plans for my rest days or for the fact that we can be together for 24hours.

I miss when its payday, because I know you will be with me helping me on the grocery.

I miss the times after work, especially if I'm on grave yard for you're with me the whole day sleeping next to me or maybe just watch me to sleep.

I miss when we're just strolling in SM waiting to get hungry so that we can eat then, Mang Inasal and have extra ricessss...

I miss when we just talk in Deep blue, waiting for hours to passed by and no dull moments because you're holding my hand, talking to me like it'll never end.

I miss it when you will give me a suprised visit at work and you'll just text me that you'll already outside, waiting for I have the chance to enjoy the littlest time but so worth it

I miss the times, when I'm at your house and you'll sing me any song with your guitar that I felt those songs were dedicated to me.

I miss the times when after grocery we then have some things to do. It's for us to reminisice those moments.

I miss it when we're on our way home and your arms wrap around me comforting me so that I will not get hurt when the jeepney stops.

I miss your hands holding mine when we cross the streets.

I miss our time together in Lilo-an plaza just to see each other before you go home.

I miss you with me at home whenever there are occassions or just small gathering.

I miss how you spoil me giving me what I want though its bad for me like junkfoods.
I miss how you just say i love you kulit and eases my mood swings.

I miss how you just hugged me and comfort me when I'm too emotioanl for I'm having my PMS.

I miss it when you scolded me or get mad at me for the bad things I do but eventually will hug me after for I'm such a jerk cry-baby.

I miss it when you will appreciate what I cooked even if it is just pancit canton or tuna with pork-n-beans.

I miss it when you'll let me cry.

I miss it when I get so mad at you real hard then, eventually after how many mintues we are then so inlove with each other.

I miss watching movies together with you.

I miss dipping those fries to sundae and will lend my hand to eat the fries dip in sundae.

I miss greenwhich and jobi and sometimes chowking for you always let me decide where and what I wanted to eat.

I miss it when I want to pee for I know after I go outside the restroom you're just waiting for me.

I miss stargazing and all our stories for the day.
I miss the headache when I want to express to you what I felt through the letters I gave.

I miss the times, when everybody is staring at us for we have the same outfit for the day.

I miss everything about the two of us. I miss every bits and every moments that we created, we shared and we enjoyed.

I miss you each passing day when you're not here with me...

I miss you, I miss you, I miss you and I will be missing you 'till you'll be back in my arms again.

iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako... mwah.. xoxoxoxoxo


L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

Emmy & Ace

Emmy & Ace




Emmy




Ace



Emmy & Ace

This is Emmy & Ace.

I can't really wait to have real both of them sooner. *winks* o.0
As of now, take a look of our Emmy and Ace.

myBanako, iL0vey0usomuch.. mwah...
Can't wait to be with you the sonnest possible. I've been dying to be with you. mwaah.. x0x0x0x0x0...

mwah..

iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako.... mwah.. x0x0x0

Loving despite the imperfections...

I'm at work, doing the usual thing... taking calls and calls and fetching emails and emails, and my awaking-outlet *thethingsthatkeepsmeawake@work* are jumping from one blog to another, and reading a lot of forums and drop by to one site to another. Hey! of course, for I'll be facing this square-faced-thing (computer) for 8 hours.

Nevertheless, as I was busy from reading blogs and blogs of other person. As I finished, my new entry for my tumbleblog account 'kulit's tumbleblog'. I happened to drop by this blog, in which he copied the entry of Bo Sanchez blog and paste it in his blog. The good thing about it, he added the source...

so there I am.. do a lot of reading, reading, and nod for I can relate much on the things that was said by Bo Sanchez, Eugenio Isabelo Tomas Reyes Sanchez Jr. or widely known as Bo Sanchez is an author, entrepreneur, video podcaster, tv personality and Roman Catholic lay evangelist in the Philippines.

The entry was about: "Stop Trying To Fix People".. just click the link and read the whole content directly from Mr. Bo Sanche'z blog.

It simply talks, about comparing our beloved ones to someone who's perfect and someone who doesn't exist. Even though how much we love them, it seems what they do for us are not enough. It's like were asking for more from our love ones. You should do this, do that, you could have do this, do that, I wish you're like this and you're like that.... Mr. Sanchez's blog talks all about this and let the reader, stop and think and nod then say 'Oh yeah!. it's true'.

And I admit, I'm like that. Maybe, I shall used "I was like that' (better to used the word 'was' for I feel I have the chance to change). I tend to nag or argue to myBanako about how he showed things to me, how he let me feel that I am loved by him and how his time was never enough for me. I never realized until now, that I was not appreciating him with every things he do for me but instead I was looking and focusing on the other not-good-side part of it. But then, I realized now what he really meant before when he said:

'i love you with my own ways, not yours'...

and definitely, his showing it to me but I was too busy and too selfish on focusing the lacking part or the missing part, the do-this and the do-thats. My bad, how I wish I can then turn back time and correct those things. Nevertheless, you can't turn back time but instead what I have is not to repeat those things again and move on, move forward.

It's never too late to realize and correct things.

I'm still grateful as ever for having you in my life myBanako. Sorry for the things before, sorry for the things that I was asking before in which I realized now that was too much... Don't worry, the next time around I'll not ask for more but instead I'll asked you to just keep on loving me with your own imperfectly-perfect way... especially with this imperfections I have.

iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako..mwaah..

still do love you soooooooo much....

... thoughts...

i woke up with having still the thoughts of him.... It's already my habit, waking up in the morning and thanking God for still giving me the chance to wake up and think of him.

It's no ordinary day, than having him with ME, physically or emotionally.
Its been 258 days, 17 hours, 39 minutes and 11 seconds or 8 months, 16 days, 17 hours, 39 minutes, 11 seconds. *calculated the date on a particular site,hehe*

Whew! that's way too long already that I haven't touch him, nor hug him nor just hear his breath. I can't deny that I'm going so crazy with this loneliness, but what can I do than just enjoy life as much as I can for I know sooner will be back in each other arms again *kulitcrosessfingers*. I'm pretty sure positive about it and can't wait when.

And for now, I'll never get tired wishing, thinking, praying and looking forward to be next to him the s00oooOOoooonesst possible. <3 id="gwProxy" type="hidden">

Happy 70th monthsarry myBanako...

hi myBanako,

everything's fall out of place when you're out of reach
everything seems to dark when you're out of sight
everyday is not as good or as wonderful when you're just near...

right now, it seems I'm living in a dream of nightmare for you're too far away...

it's really not the same when you're near... like by an hour if I need you to be next to me you're then there for me...
it's never the same when I can just touch you and hug you so tight if I want to..
it's never the same when I can just stare and cuddle each time I need you to...

i don't know how did I survive through all the nightmares... maybe, because there is YOU all along helping me through this journey...

i don't have a choice, on not falling all over again with you despite of all the things.
for my heart and my mind keep on shouting your name...
being with you, knowing and letting me know that you love me simply is the best chapter of my life..
you always lift me up during my darkest hours...

you're voice will always be the rhythms of my song...

i can't replace any touch you've given me... it made my whole system, COMPLETE..

i have love before but you're the only who can break my heart...

I never feel tired nor sick of hearing, reminiscing and watching our LOVE STORY... I can watch it all over and over and over again with YOU....

YOU are perfectly one of the greatest gift I have...

iLOveyOusomuchmyBanako.mwaah..

Happy monthsary....mwaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh,,,,,,,,,,,


L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

Happy Monthsarry

Who would know i fell n love wd someone lyk u, surely still I am..
If I could pinpoint the highlyts that lyf has offered me I could easily grab your presence out of it.

I've seen brighter days before but it's not as lyk I could stop nd think and be able to see the bright side my dark moments.

I've been hearing sounds but it's not the same as I've heard rhythms of ur voice.

I've been touched with somebody else's but its your touch which i can't strip of my system off.

Somebody comforted me before but none of them made me feel that I can!.

I've been loved before but you r the only one where my heart belongs.

I'm honestly sick of watching love stories but I don't knw y I keep repeating our love story over and over again.... bow.. hehe sabta kulit wa ko kasabot sa ko gstorya. mwah..

u are absolutely one of the best things dat happen to me

Emmy & Ace

hallloo everyone, hi to my one and only 'myBanako'...

it's been 2 weeks haven't update our blog.. 2 weeks that I was not able to share the happenning in my life or in our lives.... there were many things happenned and also received blessings...

first on the list is EMMY & ACE.. i haven't mentioned Emmy in my blog. I think this is the first time, first time also that I'll mention them both..

EMMY is our eldest baby girl, [hehehehe....as if jd kaayo] actually, she is our baby girl who's with him right now... She's actually sick the last time, and thank God she seem little bit fine nowadays though he needs to spend a lot for her... but, its all worth the pay.

ACE is our youngest baby boy, [toinksz.. hahahaha...nana pd] his with me right now... After I arrived at home, I'll spend playing with him for hours and hours eventhough I still haven't sleep from duty. I bought him last September 19 and also quite expensive but still worth the price...


i'll be posting sooner their pics.... so keep updated guysz.. ^___^...

iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako.. mwah..

ps: i really wanna met Emmy soooooonnn..

Happy Birthday myBanako...

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Happy Birthday myBanako...

Though we are miles apart, I want you to know that you still have the bigger place here in my cute little heart... I'm missing you so much and can't wait to be with you...

iL0veyou and i always will...
Hope to be with you soon..

Happy Birthday....mwaah..

iL0veyous0much.. with all of ME...
mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Shout out: http://lovingfromadistance.com/
--- I made a shout out on lovingfromadistance.com website for his Bday message and here it is.... weeee..

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

29th wish: ......his wishes....

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29: ...his space...

I'll give him the 3 days to post his wishes... came from him... His birthday is fast approaching.... whew!.. days passed by so quickly and i'm lovin it....

myBanako, post your wishes here....

28: ...his space...

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28: ...his space...

I'll give him the 3 days to post his wishes... came from him... His birthday is fast approaching.... whew!.. days passed by so quickly and i'm lovin it....

myBanako, post your wishes here....

27th wish: CONTINUE TO MAKE PLANS for OUR FUTURE with ME...

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27. CONTINUE TO MAKE PLANS for OUR FUTURE with ME...

This makes me strive hard to fulfill each plans we have and I know you do. I can't wait for our plans to come into reality myBanako. Those plans serves as my inspiration to go on each day for I know every bits of those plans are worth striving, fighting for.

And what I want is to be with you 'til we fulfill everything... and 'til we can't ask for more than just be with each other for the rest of our lives or as long as we live...

Can't wait to have real Emmy and Ace and more of them in the future... hehehe...

Take good care of Emmy myBanako, and I will take good care of Ace... I can assure you of that...


mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

26th wish: STAY THE SAME with the GOOD side but DO CHANGE with the BAD...

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26. STAY THE SAME with the GOOD side but DO CHANGE with the BAD...

Keep up the good side myBanako.... wla koi ma.storya kai gsapot koh...hahahahh....

basta mao na cya... klaro jd nga gsapot koh.. dili njd ni wish.. gsapot lng jd koh!...

update soonerr............

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

25th wish: SISTER'S WISH...

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25. SISTER'S WISH...

Ohh, I'm so sorry....I forgot.... huhuuhuh... It's not that I'm lazy I just totally forgot that I should post the wish of her sister as I promised on the 20th..... my bad.....And it just the wish was totally, plainly out of my mind... uhuhuhuhu.. for thinking of some things or thinking on someone....not until, I found last night a piece of paper where I wrote is sister wish for me. For I asked her sister one time, when I got a chance to talk to her online... I mean chat with her... and the wish .. she says:

"bsta ako.a lng no.1 wish for him is to let him have all the best things life has to offer na unta ma.achieve niya all his dreams in life..."


my bad, I'm guilty..huhuhu.. I was not able to post the wish on the 20th... uhuhuuh....

Anyways, it's his sister wish.... and my wish on the 25th is to love you more and more each day... hehehe..mwaah


mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

24th wish: WORDS I WANNA SAY EACH DAY...

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24. WORDS I WANNA SAY EACH DAY...

I can't think of any wishes anymore.... heehehe.. I'm running out of wishes myBanako... huhuhu.. Just 6 days to go, and weee.. It is your special day... onsa man ko egift nimo wui, wla man ka anhi..huuhuh....

Anyways, this might not sound a wish but this is what I wanna do 'as long as I live'... I wanna tell you and let you feel nga.... love jd tka.. heheheh.. and the words that I wanna say each day is.....

i love you... and as always...

Let me tell it one more time, 'iloveyousomuchmyBanako..mwaaahh..'...

again...again... i love you so much still... I'm not still satisfied... i love you..mwah..
for the last time, i love you so much myBanako..mwaaaaaaahhhhh..

last njd nih.... hehehehhe.... love ayo tka, as n..mao na timan.e... whew!. can't help myself dah... nahan ko e.hug tka and say: 'iloveyou, iloveyou, iloveyou, iloveyou, iloveyou, iloveyou....' hehehe..mwaaah..

iL0veyousomuchmyBanako..mwaah.. last najd nah...

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako.. hahaha last na nih ^.^

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

iL0veyou..mwaah... ^_^

23rd wish: KEEPING UP THE THINGS YOU LOVE ABOUT US... esp. THE SIMILARITIES...

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23. KEEPING UP THE THINGS YOU LOVE ABOUT US... esp. THE SIMILARITIES...

Continue to keep the things you love us, for the differences are the spices but our similarities are the things that inspire and made our day. I actually remembered something, your valentine letter you gave where the content is "20 Things You Love About Us"...

Keep it up myBanako, keep up how we made each our days special and complete. Keep up how you love me that much.. hehehe... For while you're keeping me up I am keeping you as well, hear in my little kulit heart.

We have one thing in common: "We may differ in many things but we share the same feelings to conquer all for this love we have.." Oh yeah \m/... OUR LOVE ROCKS, no matter how cheesy this may seem to others. How corny I am.... But those don't matter, I love him. He loves me. We love each other and that's the only thing that matters...

B, murag dli na wish sah?... hehehe, anyways, iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako.. and super miss you....

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

22nd wish: CONTINUE TO LOVE OUR DIFFERENCES...

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22. CONTINUE TO LOVE OUR DIFFERENCES...

Honestly, I'm hating this for we argue a lot... hehehe... sorry, can't help it that you love me in your own ways not my own ways. But, no more buts kulit... toinksz, gyaw2x lagi ko saq self...

I'm thinking on the other side... The brighter side, our differences help a lot with our relationship for we know different things from each other, we learn different things and this put spices to our relationship but we need to make sure that it is not too much because ma.sobra.an nya dli na sakto... hehehe... Pero, mahurt man jpon ko B.. kaw man gd!.. huuhuhuhu... And despite the differences love jpon ayo tka... As in so much...

I'll try myBanako, nga dli naq mg.palabi nimo.... Your wish will be granted sooonnn....
mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Our differences proves that two different individual can love each other so perfect despite the differences and the imperfections and of course, I am still perfectly in love with you... mwah..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

21st wish: CONTINUE TO UNDERSTAND THINGS....

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21. CONTINUE TO UNDERSTAND THINGS....

Me, too will try to continue to understand things the way you want me to understand those things. I too can't let you understand what I want you to understand. However, you always win and I'm not against it. I just want you to know, that I need you... Not just thought, not just mere words, I need you to let me feel you're there, your love. I need you more each day especially now that we're too far away from each other.

I'm not against on anything that you do. I'm happy whatever, wherever and whichever you choose to enjoy or spend your day. What I just want you to understand is to let me know when will be your time for me. Time nga para ako.a ra for the whole long day imo rman jd nah...

There will be things that we don't understand... For we ourselves, have different things to understand and wish we can make ourselves understand each other.

Soon you'll understand enough what I felt... I just don't know when or how, maybe someday, somewhere, somehow....

and I too will understand things more deeper....

But for now, I'll let things... I'll let myself needing you more and more....

I'm still in love with you though.... as in that muccchhhhhhhh......

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

happy 69th monthsarry myBanako...

Hi myBanako,

I can't think of any wish on this day for what I have in mind is the thought of having you near. So near within my reach, so near that I can just hug you anytime of the day, so near that you can just hear me say 'iloveyousomuchmyBanako' each day.


myBanako, thank you for everything. I really can't thank you enough, though we have flaws we still manage to make everything alright. Thank you for still holding on and for not giving up on us. Thank you for everything, I just don't know how to thank you that much...

I just remember the days, before the moment we separated our ways I'll then think the next time will see each other or be with each other. Right now, its way much different cause it's pretty big to ask to be with you. huhuhuhu....

Nevertheless, as long as we're here for each other I know we can surpass it all. We belong to each other. Ako para imo og ikaw para ako..mwaah..


happy 69th monthsarry myBanako..mwaah..

iL0veyousomuchmyBanako...mwah....

19th wish : DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WITH THE WORD: 'IMPRINTING'?

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19. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WITH THE WORD: 'IMPRINTING'?

Well, I got to say that word struck me when reading the 4 books of Twilight. Way too adiccted with Twilight already, hahahah... Anyhow, I'm not like Jacob Black whose a werewolf, who falls in love with his bestfriend Bella and later on imprints with her baby, toinks hahaha. He is no similarity than me but with only one thing in common we find the ONE, like Bella find Edward and him to her.

The ONE who is our DESTINY...

I imprinted to this particular guy...

ehem!... that makes me a werewolf girl... toinksz!.. orr vampire girl?...hhmmm... not still, i'm happy as francis girl.. weeee....

Here's how I define Imprinting base on Twilight.

Imprinting : based on Twiligth book is finding who is your soulmate. Finding the person whom you can't live without. Finding the one who will complete you. Finding the right man/woman for you. Finding the one who wants to keep you safe from all harm and pain. Finding that imperfect person whom you know where you belong that it really hurst when your apart. Finding your destiny. Finding the one you will do everything and anything to the person he/she imprints.

Yahoo Answers for Imprinting:
http://answers.yahoo.com/

Furthermore, it's my 19th wish for I want you to know that there's nothing you can do with what I really felt toward you myBanako. I loveeee you way tooo much and I can't afford to lose you, never ever again. And what I felt for you is more than Jacob Black, Bella Swan or Edward Cullen love each other. It's more than anything else. I love you this ssoooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much. [ps: yaw lagi palabi sa gbati kulit...hahaha]


B, dili naman ni wish wui... hehehe.. just so you know that...

No one’s ever loved anyone as much as I love you.

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

blog anniverssary....

I didn't noticed yesterday that it was our blog anniverssary..... whew!.. one year na d.ay ni atong blog myBanako.. and still, gamay2x rman tag na.post na memories...

dali rajd ang panahon myBanako noh?..pero, dugay cya if layo ka naq....dugay kaayo mahuman ang adlaw....

happy 1st anniverssary sa among blog... continue to store our memories for us to look back and reminisce someday when our hair turns grey and we have our grand little children on our side...

og bisan asa pa mi ma.abot pohon!... naa jpon ni nga blog...hehehehehhe....


to myBanako, i love you so much jpon... malayo or maduol....mwaaah...

18th wish: CONTINUE TO TRUST DESPITE AND IN SPITE WHAT HAD HAPPENED...

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18. CONTINUE TO TRUST DESPITE AND IN SPITE WHAT HAD HAPPENED...

I know, I know... I exactly know that our relationship have flaws regarding trusting each other. But it doesn't stop there, we can correct all things and its never too late to correct things. It doesn't mean that we are constant on things especially on that. Remember you once told before, everybody changes, right? Thus, we have a big space to change and a lot of time to change. We argue about it, we hated each other due to it but what is important, we learned from our mistakes, we grow up, we move on...

So, with my 18th wish do not let bad memories prevail but the good ones. The good ones and our plans in which sooner be fulfilled.

You once said, 'kulit, love tka mao nay timan.e og mao nay hunahuna way lain pah...' and so you should also start thinking that with my love for you myBanako...


I love you so much, I do.....

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

17th wish: CONTINUE TO UNDERSTAND MY TANTRUMS...

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17. CONTINUE TO UNDERSTAND MY TANTRUMS...

Hahahay, I do have many tantrums og kaw ray rason nganong ma.trigger nah.. dli naman ni wishes B... hahaha..wish ni para naq naman dli para imo... hahaha..

Anyways, please do lengthen your patience and understanding. But eventually you already know the solution to each of the tantrums that you experienced. You already know how to stop my tantrum and make me calm. Og of course, dapat lng kai kaw rabay rason nganong mag.tantrums ko... hahaha...

I'm really such a spoiled brat, bwahehhe.. daddy, daddy.. hahhaha..

Kaw gd, kaw man jd maka.ingon ana akong mga tantrums. If you can just keep kanang pinaka.nahan naq nimo nga mg.cge ka char2x naq (nga imo ingon tinuod nah, dli rana char2x.. hehehehe)...I'll never have these tantrums...

If you can just keep my francis smile, the smile I know for me rajd, my francis mind, nga para ako rapd og my francis heart so there will be no reason at all for having those tantrums... hehehe

I still do love you so much, please do understand myBanako hap....mwaah..

I miss you and miss you so much.. never I day, I haven't think of You...

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

When I'm With You...

Time to reminisce our songs....

Songs that are part of our journey...
and
Songs that are witnessed on how we conquer each odds.....

Faber Drive - When I'm With You lyrics

Saw you walk in to the room
Thought i'd try to talk to you
Babe am i every glad you wanted me too
Its been two years to the day
half the time I've been away
i know I'm not there enough
but that is gonna change
cause I'm coming back
to show you that
I'm keeping the promise that i made

When i'm with you
I'll make every second count
cause i miss you, whenever your not around
when i kiss you
i still get butterflies
years from now
I'll make every second count
when I'm with you

yeah we've had our ups and downs
but we've always worked them out
babe am i ever glad we got this far now
still i'm lying here tonight
wishing i was by your side
cause when i'm not there enough
nothing feels right
so i'm coming back to show you that I'll love you the rest of my life

when i'm with you
I'll make every second count
cause i miss you, whenever your not around
when i kiss you
i still get butterflies
years from now
i'll make every second count
when i'm with you
when i'm with you

whatever it takes
im not gonna break the promise i made

when i'm with you
I'll make every second count
cause i miss you

when i'm with you
I'll make every second count
cause i miss you, whenever your not around
when i kiss you
i still get butterflies
years from now
i'll make every second count
when i'm with you
when i'm with you
when i'm with you
when i'm with you

We already heard the song before, way back 4th year college in his bhauz however, we never noticed that it has a nice lyrics. 'till one day, I think that was August 25, 2008 when we already know the result of the Board Passers for Nursing who took the exam last June 2008. That day, I went to their house to see the result and yepey, 10100 ESGUERRA, FRANCIS ANDRADE. After he let me see the result, I felt then scared because that is the go signal that we were waiting for that he will fly to NZ, the first plan was Australia but then, something went wrong I guess so it was then NZ. He then, sing me that song with his guitar and keep on repeating the line : " whatever it takes..im not gonna break the promise i made".

And what's my reaction?... hehehe....

I just cried my heart out... for I was touched for what he did and was also scared with the final decision that he will be part ways someday. He then, hug me so tight and keep on telling me 'iloveyou kulit'.. aah!!.. I miss you like crazy myBanako... hahaha.. simang....

Furthemore, we are now on the current situation and hoping that he will really fulfiill the line : .im not gonna break the promise i made.

Actually, right now I'm using the song as my ringtone.

i still love you so much myBanako, whether layo or duol. Love jd ayo tka.. mwaah..

iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako...mwaah

16th wish: CONTINUE TO TELL ME THOSE WORDS I WANNA HEAR FROM YOU....

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16. CONTINUE TO TELL ME THOSE WORDS I WANNA HEAR FROM YOU....

Below are randomly pick lines and also some of my favorite lines from our conversation. He sometimes tell me those words, if of course where in good terms og hhmmm... naka.tamak cguro og iti sa NZ nya nag.maayo ang buot.. hahaa, just kidding...

- i ask him onsa iyang wishes for his bday...

BbF: i wish ur here.. nothing else
BbF: i love you kulit..
BbF: kw rjd akong wish sa pgkakaron
BbF: di nko nhan mwala pka nko my asawa
BbF: till heaven wud take us my aswa

- randomly pick conversation we have last Sept. 9

BbF: bday nko rn nga month
kULiT: hehe
BbF: wa ka
BbF: huhuh
BbF: guol ko my aswa
BbF: mwah..
kULiT : lagi, it sad to know pd..
kULiT : ako pd gani..
BbF: oo
kULiT : ka.remember ko last year..
kULiT: hehe
kULiT : ka.remember paka?
kULiT : i was so hapi seing u so hapi wid wat i did
BbF: ako pd
kULiT : karon kabaliktaran pd.
BbF: happy mn jd bsta naa k my aswa
BbF: mwah.

BbF: i love you my asawa.
BbF: mwah


I can't help myself from smiling reading the conversation we have. I have actually a lot of save conversation's and text messages and letters from him.... And whenever, I miss him the most I scanned my notebooks, my scrapbooks and my emails just to read those messages he have for me. Since, before and till now, I keep on doing those especially if I have nothing much to do but just want to reminisce memories... I even have some rude text messages and emails from him, hehhehe.. pero those don't cout much... For what matter is "i love him much and he loves me much..."

iL0veyou so dearly myBanako...mwah...

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

15th: CONTINUE TO THINK I'LL BE WITH YOU SOONER....

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15. The 15th of September, and CONTINUE TO THINK I'LL BE WITH YOU SOONER....

Dali.a ra sa panahon B wui, Sept. 15 nah... hapit na mg.October npd.. hehehe.. and this means myBanako, that a chance to be near you again, to be with you again, to subtract the nth days that we're not together and add to the sum of days or to the hopes that we will be in each other's arms again. Please do help me myBanako, on things that I really wanted to do especially the plans we have. Please....hehehe, ka.remember ko sa imong line nga: 'kaw jd kulit noh, desperada kaayo ka pero nahan koh...' hehehe....

I just want to be near or be with you again myBanako, this is what my heart long and desire each and every day... mwaaah..

iL0veyou so dearly myBanako...mwah...

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

14th wish: DO ENJOY THINGS even without ME...

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14. DO ENJOY THINGS even without ME...

Yeah, I know this one. You can even live in a world without me.. ako rman ang dli, hehehe.. but anywayz, I'm happy to know you can just enjoy and live without me so that sooner or later if possibilities are really there dli naka mg.lisod pa... and ako nlang kai 'i will cross the brigde when I get there, but as what I said before. Once I cross the bridge it will be totally a different world when you're not part of it... All will be different but still be so glad and so thankful I oncepart of your world' if ever that happens...

whew, advance thought rajd ni myBanako.... but, I will surely be happy if you'll fulfill my 13th wish... more than happy myBanako... I still want us to fulfill the 13th wish....

And what I just want you to do is to : ENJOY, be SAFE, have clean plain FUN and do PRAY....

Wherever you are right now myBanako, I'm praying for your safety and others who's with you right now. Please do extra care because wla ta kahibaw sa lugar..

I'm crossing my fingers lng nga mo.txt ka ron... mwaaah....

DO ENJOY myBanako, mwaaah......

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...



ps: right now, nag.laag akong bana ron... to.a sa snow, can't remmeber the name of the place....
i always feels missing him so much if there are activities nga we can't be togeder.... huhuhuh

13th wish: DON'T EVER DARE LET ME GO...

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13. DON'T EVER DARE LET ME GO...

You once said this, and I'm telling you this from me to you. My 13th wish: DON'T YOU EVER DARE LET ME GO myBanako. No matter what happens, keep on holding me... Keep me so close... Don't ever lose your grip on me... Don't ever give up on on me, nor us...

I'm keeping your words, as much as I am keeping mine...

You once said, follow what my heart desires and so, I'LL NOT DARE LET YOU GO EITHER, for who I want is YOU... and that is what my heart truly desires. TO BE NEXT TO YOU in every SINGLE BREATH I TAKE...

iL0veyou so dearly myBanako...mwah...

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

12th wish: CONTINUE TO BE PATIENT SA AKONG PG.KA SO CALLED : "KULIT"...

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12. CONTINUE TO BE PATIENT SA AKONG PG.KA SO CALLED : "KULIT"...

Did you ever regret you made me that nick myBanako?.... hehehe, very well, I'am well mould and well developed to be your only 'kulit'. No one ever can made such as kulit as I am without Francis in every step of the way. I'm like a spoiled brat and you were my so ever loving and caring daddy that you spoils me everything. But that was before, now you try to make me things that are way out of my limitations but still I understand you're helping me to be just as strong as you are. And still, my being pgka.kulit ruleszzz still hugry for everything you showed me and you taught me. Still thirsty with every single things you want me to learn. Very well, I understand things as much as I wanted you to understand things, the way I understand it.

Fortunately, I still have this so called attitude that you once put into me 'pagka.kulit jd'... hehehe.. I even can remember you once said, 'mypa dli nalng kulit akong g.tawag nimo dah, honey lng ta toh...' hahahaha...

Anywaysz myBanako, I'm loving every single changes I have for you. Every single changes that entitles me sooner to be yours and yours only.

iL0vey0usomuchmyBanako... mwaah...

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

11th wish: LEARN TO FORGET AND FORGIVE...

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11. LEARN TO FORGET AND FORGIVE...

FORGET the hurtful things and FORGIVE those who hurt you and don't forget to pray for them. I also do this, you knew every bit or inch of me from the tip of my toe to the tip of a strand of my hair. You knew everything about me, good or bad and all the things that I went through. One good-but-not-so-good factor I have is FORGETTING THE PAST, you told me the word before 'repression'.

I am a repressionist, hmmm. am I using the right term? But anyways, yes I am like that. Right myBanako? You explained it to me very well before and after explaining what the word 'repression' means you just hug me so tight that what I did was close my eyes because all those are haunting me again but I'm not afraid anymore for I know you're with me.

Meaning of Repression:
Repression is the operation by which the subject repels and keeps at a distance from consciousness representations (thoughts, images, memories) that are disagreeable because they are incompatible with the ego.

link: http://www.answers.com/topic/repression

In relation to my 10th wish: LEARN TO FORGET or shall I say, can you repress those bad memories? Bad memories that will destroy you and me, will hurt your feelings and mine and will destroy our precious relationship. Can you? Please do try myBanako, I can't no longer dare to think next day, or next-next day or next month we will be arguing on the same bad things again.

Let's repress those things together. Okay?

mwaaaaaaaaahhhh.... iL0vey0us0muchmyBanako..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...

10th wish: CONTINUE ON HOW OFTEN YOU KEEP IN TOUCH...

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10.CONTINUE ON HOW OFTEN YOU KEEP IN TOUCH...

MyBanako, I really appreciate your efforts. Bisan og onsa na nga time diha but still you never miss nga mo.keep in touch. And it makes me so extra special. Please don't change that, I really do like how often you keep in touch with me. It makes me forget kadyot the loneliness I felt, especially when makamata ko nga kaw g.pokaw naq sa uzzap... hehehe... It makes me extra super special jd...

So, with my 10th wish: CONTINUE ON HOW OFTEN YOU KEEP IN TOUCH...

You just don't know kapila ko mg.cge check sa uzzap to know if online ka or dli....hehehe. not just 20 times or 50 times, every minute man guro mg.cge ko check uzzap just to check if online ka or dili.... hehehe..

Please don't change that myBanako hap... and please do keep it up...

I will be waiting for you each and every day, or every minutes to talk with you 'til I will be next to you or be with your arms again....

I will be waiting for you... mwah... I miss you so much...mwah..

Happy advance birthday to you myBanako...

Hope to be with you sooner myBanako.. mwah..

L0ve L0ts,
kulit, your asawa

hoping, praying, wishing and looking forward to be with You again...